This is what are talking about on the 'Discipline & Love' DD forums this week. Just click on the title of the topic to read or join the conversation. If you are not already a member, you will need to follow the directions on how to register.
'When to disclose what we do'
"Good morning all, I have a question for all of you. I hope that you can help me. I am currently seeing a counsellor as well as meeting with my pastors wife for my depression. I have also had issues with my temper and lashing out and G is on the receiving end of that. Which he does not tolerate and I am punished.
So my question is what do I say when this comes up in conversation with these two women? One of them is bound to ask so how does your husband deal with your outbursts and lashing out at him?"
'The HOH point of view'
"A week or so ago, the Duke made a very interesting and important post on EsMay's blog. You can read it here: http://www.submittingtobeled.blogspot.c ... -duke.html
"Just a day or so before, my partner and I had had a conversation, during which he made some of the same points. (R is every bit as much a natural HOH as I am a tih, yet he is reluctant to talk about it often: He just DOES D/d. So I know that he really needed to express his feelings on this subject.) Here's the part of the Duke's post where there is a great deal of commonality (Both EsMay and the Duke know that I'm writing this post, and they approve of my referencing their blog)................"
'Not want to obey'
"Do any of you go through times when you just don't feel like doing what you are told to? I have just not felt like listening. I was asked to do 2 submissive acts and just don't feel like doing them. He hasn't been real consistent with enforcing the rules so I guess maybe that has something to do with it. I don't know. I just don't feel like listening.
Anyone else ever go through times like this?............."
'DD - For Life, or Just a Phase?'
"A couple of weeks ago we were talking with a friend about DD. She and her fiance know about us now, and she had some questions. She had a question about it being a phase, and some things to ask about it. She did not mean that we were just doing it as a phase, but I was suprised to see the Duke speak up and tell her that if she thought it was just a phase, she had the wrong opinion of it. That DD was for life. If I ever withdrew consent, he'd abide by that, but he'd not feel any peace about it. He saw DD as a life long solution, and wanted her to realize that.............."
'The BUT In Being Thankful'
"I was not feeling well today, fighting this cold I just can't seem to get a head of. The Duke surprised me with breakfast in bed, and then lunch in bed. He also cleaned the bathroom because he knew I'd be going to do it today. The bathtub was even wiped down and around the toilet as well.
I walk in and see him on the floor, mopping the floor around where we keep the cats' litter... with a white face cloth. And all the sudden there was panic inside of me, and I couldn't stop the words that tumbled from my mouth. They were said respectfully, but they were still out before I realized it. "Are you using a wash cloth on the floor?" I could see uncertainty cross his face, and he admitted with a sudden guiltful expression that he was, and I could tell that up to that moment, he was so happy to be helping me.............."
"I've been out of the loop for a long time and haven't posted in here since September of last year!! I'm working on figuring out this submission thing. I don't think I'm naturally submissive at all. I'm seeing Tom step up to his HOH role more and more which is fabulous. However, I feel like there are a ton of little things I do that still undermine the dom/sub relationship. I don't think it's necessarily intentional, but just habit from having been married for nearly 11 years with a different dynamic............."